Hurtful Children

- - Those who wish we'd all get along like children have obviously never been a child. Some of the most vicious, hurtful, and potentially damaging things that have ever been done to me were done to me when I was a child by other children.

While under the age of ten, I was once dragged the length of a large swimming pool...underwater...by other older children. They pulled me by my legs so as to make it impossible for me to stand up and breathe. I never knew who my assailants were as they grabbed me from behind; fortunately I knew to hold my breath while being dragged underwater.

Once while walking through a secondary school cafeteria in my early teens, my mechanical pencil was ripped from my pocket by an older male who held the pencil by either end while his seat-mate karate-chopped the pencil in half. When I expressed my displeasure over their actions, the pieces of the pencil were thrown at my face, its jagged edges opening up cuts. I never even knew what their names were.

As a child while shoveling my parents' sidewalk free of snow one winter, this simple action or my odious presence was apparently enough to cause an older male child to start kicking snow back over the cleaned path. Again, I never even knew his name.

These cited examples are not all-inclusive, but are simply remembered instances that come to mind illustrating how cruel children can be to other children. Probably you can think of numerous other examples of your own from your own personal experiences.

--So we should all learn to get along like children?--Generally speaking, this is not a good idea!

The Not-So-Good Old Days...

-- The past is calling...and usually what it says is, "Wasn't it great?"

I usually get one or two e-mails a week of the type from well-intentional people that suggest that everything was better in the past. You know what I mean; they say things like, "Remember when you could leave your house unlocked and not worry?," or "Remember when you could leave your keys in the car and not have it stolen?"

Yeah, I do remember...but such flashes to the past are usually selective and far from comprehensive, regarding the past with rose-colored glasses. You never see a nostalgia item that proclaims, "Remember when blacks and gays were regarded as sub-human?," "Remember when we lived in fear that the Russians might bomb us back into the stone age?," "Remember when lots more people died at an earlier age?," or "Remember when religious and sexual bias were operational and institutionalized?" These things, too, were part of the past, but are conveniently excluded from too many flashbacks.

There were many cool, commendable, and noteworthy things about the past, but it was far from golden and returning to it might eliminate some problems but create others. All in all, it's well to remember that the "Good Old Days" weren't all that great...

Mistaken Identity?

 - - The political far right loves to demonize President Obama as a dark-skinned, war-hating socialist who wants to give us all health care...

...they've apparently confused him with Jesus!  

The Need for Moderation...

- - He stares at you from the news screen, looking like a demented Uncle Fester from The Addams Family; the Tucson, Arizona shooter.

If you have heard the inflammatory speech being issued in this country for years now against those of dissenting political views, you are perhaps not totally surprised that hateful speech has found translation into hateful action. Prolonged exposure to the politics of hate and extreme partisanship tends to incline marginal and emotionally disturbed minds in this direction.

The underlying mentality seems to be that if you disagree with the political philosophy of duly elected officials, it is acceptable to demonize and oppose them with every breath and every action that you take. Gone is the notion of "the loyal opposition" that accepts even if it dislikes the will of the majority, and works within the system to seek a common ground or at least awaits the next election to seek the installation of other candidates.

Political extremism and vicious intolerance are not American values, and must be repudiated by both political parties and any third parties that arise. We are also overdue to get serious about gun control in this country so that domestic terrorists and other warped fanatics can't continue to attempt to write their own versions of history drenched in blood and twisted in their own image...

A Portable Feast!

I appreciate Xmas for different things, especially enjoying the subtle notes of irony and sarcasm which can underlie the fragile surface veneer of good will towards men supposed to characterize the season. As Xmas draws nearer, you can both see and hear how frazzled and worn many of the overworked and underpaid clerks are getting, like our good friend Jack as illustrated!

Waiting in a long line at the service desk of an area post office, I heard the attendant ask one of many customers if there was anything else he could do for her. While his words were properly what should have been said, his tone of voice, bordering on the edge of going postal, spoke an entirely different message that was absolutely marvelous!

--Ah, Christmas!--Is there anything else that so brings out the best and the worst in people?

Another of the Greats, Gone...

- - Surely Leslie Nielsen can't be dead!

Yes, he is dead...and don't call him Shirley! Appearing in over 100 films including the Sci-Fi classic Forbidden Planet, Leslie Nielsen enjoyed great success as both a serious and comic actor. When you see him in a serious role in one of his earlier films like The Poseidon Adventure, you almost wait for Leslie to do or say something outrageous! The classic gags would come later in Airplane, Police Squad, and the Naked Gun series. Leslie enjoyed a second cinematic life in comedy, and was a natural master of it.

Thank you, Leslie Nielsen, for brightening our lives, and for doing a multitude of things well!

Distracted Driving...

 - -In the past five years I've been rear-ended twice by distracted drivers while stopped in the line of traffic, most recently while at a red light.  Both accidents would have been easily avoided if the other driver had been paying attention to what they were supposed to have been doing, but no, the one was on a cell phone and the other was paying too much attention to their passenger!

Distracted driving is a serious problem compounded by other unsafe driving practices in common use such as following too closely!  Remember how you're supposed to keep a car length behind the driver ahead for each 10 mph of speed?--It's true, folks!  Follow that simple rule, and you'll have plenty of room to stop; don't, and you won't be able to...it's basic physics!

But back to distracted driving; I cringe every time that I see someone driving with a cell phone plastered to their ear.  Most of the cell phone conversations being held by drivers are completely unnecessary, nothing that wouldn't wait until they were out of the car!  Multi-tasking is a myth; in reality, multi-taskers are simply shifting their attention between one thing and the other, which isn't nearly good enough for potentially serious tasks such as driving where the circumstances and input variables can change rapidly, demanding,  yes, your complete and undivided attention!  While cell phones are a prime contributer to distracted driving, other potentially dangerous behaviors while driving and in motion include changing the radio or CD, eating, drinking, applying make-up, texting (God help us!), or paying too much attention to human or animal passengers.

Some states wiser than mine have already made it illegal to be using a cell phone while driving.  Until such laws are universal, please hang up the damn phone, and drive!

Fall Solstice!

F

I, for one, am ready for fall after one of the hottest summers on record.  Well, fall is coming in with a full moon...So have yourselves a howling good time!!!

Death Becomes Him...

 - - It's hard to believe that Michael Jackson's already been deceased for a year, and as for Elvis before him,  death has proven to be a smart career move for the late King of Pop.  His estate has reportedly earned about a billion dollars since his demise, with Jackson recordings flying off the shelves that were previously languishing there.

Now that Michael's gone, we'll also be hearing some new recordings, with the singer having recorded over 100 songs, many of which were not to be released until after his death, a gift to his children.  All of this means that "Blanket" won't have to worry about funds for college...

Now "Skynet Jesus?"

 - - In Ohio a six-story statue of Jesus constructed of wood and styrofoam over a steel frame was struck by lightning, and burned to the ground.  Dubbed the "Touchdown Jesus" because of the statue's pose, only the steel frame remains.  

This brings to mind the scene in The Terminator movie where the T-800 has his human flesh burned away, leaving  just the metallic endoskeleton marching about, still a deadly menace to the human characters...


...and wouldn't a six-story Jesus endoskeleton on the rampage be totally cool?

Bad Restaurant Art...

 - - There's a lot of really bad art hanging in restaurants, especially in the one- or two-star ones that I frequent (it's all about money, really)!  There's actually more bad art than good art about, and some of it is really interesting as you can sit there and ponder what the artists did wrong!

On one wall of one such restaurant, there's a still life featuring the classic basket of fruit, but this one is done so poorly that it makes wax fruit look mouth-watering!  On another wall of the same hangs a needlepoint of a smiling Greek girl, but the creator took the red of the mouth much too far, giving the girl a Joker-type leer.  On another wall hangs a needlework of a shepherd with a goat being approached by a girl with a dog.  To entertain myself while waiting for a meal, I write dialogue in my head about that one!

So cherish the abundance of bad art that you'll see everywhere around you, gratified by the fact that you probably could create better than at least half of what you see about!

Forgotten and Obscure Instruments...

 - - It entered my mind the other day that no one plays the ocarina anymore; in fact, you could probably ask a crowd of people what an ocarina was to find few who knew.  The ocarina is a strange little musical instrument looking like a potato with holes that is played with the mouth.

The ocarina is an obscure musical instrument in the same class as other little-known music-makers such as the jaw harp and kazoo.  If you pulled out any of these devices today, you'd probably be wrestled to the ground as a probable terrorist as they are largely unrecognized in current times.

When I was a kid in long-ago times, we had and played kazoos; in fact, I participated in some great and spirited choruses of kid kazoo playing.  I was pretty good with a kazoo, actually, and could produce lots of recognizable melodies.  That was because in those primitive and medieval times, we didn't have and feel entitled to $200 hand-held video games...being ignorant, I didn't even  realize how bad I had it!

Rum Dumb...

The other day while watching a Jeopardy show, I aced all of the questions in a category about liquor without really trying.   This might surprise anyone who knows me, because I haven't had an alcoholic drink in many years, and was never into drinking.  I'm rather knowledgeable about alcoholic beverages, however, because of my mother!

Most people have mothers who teach them about flowers, birds, cooking, the social graces...you know, nice stuff!  My mother, however, was rather heavily into beer, and actually couldn't enjoy the greatest meal in the best restaurant unless she was able to get beer served with it.  My mother fit most definitions of being alcohol-dependent, and actually tried hard to get me to develop a taste for beer before I went away to college...she was not successful!- -Ain't that a kick in the head?--I disappointed my mother by not becoming a beer drinker!   Through intensive exposure and vicarious learning, I came to know a lot about alcoholic beverages in general and beer in particular.

I came to know the inside of taverns even when a child, and was taken to bars while on family vacations.- - My mother actually had a beer can collection!  I came to know the fine points of domestic versus imported beers, and it was not unusual for my parents to down a pitcher of beer with a restaurant meal.  My mother consumed at least a quart a day, often having a "nightcap."

Some parents wind up being ashamed of their children's drinking...I wound up being ashamed of my mother's!   Even when a senior citizen. she was actually cut off by bartenders in some  establishments, a fact for which I give them credit.  Alcoholism, you see, is not a problem restricted to the young...

...things like this are why I can't really get excited or nostalgic on Mother's Day...

 

Furry Predestination...

 -- I think that I was born furry, and had that animal-orientation even before I realized what it was and could attach a name to it.  I had tons of comic books and watched countless hours of 'toons on TV, especially the classic Warner Brothers stuff.  This interest and orientation continued into my teenaged years and into adulthood, albeit secretly...adults aren't supposed to still be watching cartoons or identifying with animal characters in them!  It was actually kind of a solitary existence, since I never realized that there were others like myself until the advent of the internet.

How have 'toons changed since I was a kid?--Well, generally with some exceptions,  production values are lower, and they aren't as well-drawn; story lines are far more daring, however, and go places that were utterly unthinkable way back when.   More real life situations are covered as well, which means that 'toons have actually become somewhat therapeutic, almost psychotherapy for the masses.  Edgy and dark things are not only acceptable, but are far more mainstream, and art and literature can be united in the best of them...

He Who Yells Loudest...

 - - The way politics has gone lately (especially on the far right), one might think that the person who is correct is not the one with the best argument, but rather the one who states his viewpoint the most often and the loudest, preferably with the greatest intimidation factor...

...when and why did civil disagreement cease to exist in America?!

Sweet Irony!

 - - I picked up a ten dollar bill recently on which a wingnut-type had written some comments.  On one side, it was written, "9-11 was an inside job!"  On the other side of the bill, the handwritten legend read, "Back to the Constitution!"

Ironically, writing on currency is technically defacing it, which is a violation of the law.  The Constitution is the foundation of law, so the currency bill writer wasn't practicing what he preached!

Choose Your Apocalypse...

 - - Lots of people are hung up on December 21st, 2012 as the day when the global shop of mankind may be closed down owing to the Mayan calendar running out on that date...

...then you might wish to select the year 2018 as a cause for concern, as Terminator movies suggest that's when Skynet will become self-aware, and the War of the Machines will commence...

...or, you might prefer to look ahead to the year 2029, when astronomers say there's about a 1-in-37 chance of an asteroid hitting the earth!

In short, choose your doomsday...if any!  

Zip This!

 - - Have you ever gotten your zipper stuck?  I'm not going to talk about the zipper on your pants, which can add an additional dimension of urgency and humiliation to the problem, but just an ordinary run-of-the mill outerwear jacket zipper.  You're just about to go into a store, and you realize that the freakin' thing has gone off the track, and now your jacket is gaping open at the bottom and the top, with the zipper trolley (or whatever you call it) binding the coat only at the middle, and leaving you looking like the world's biggest dork...

...so you try to pull the zipper down to the bottom and get it back on the track, but the infernal thing just won't engage with the teeth there!  After trying the process several times, you're no longer feeling cool about it but are growing increasingly self-conscious, and beginning to feel that your coat has turned into a straight jacket!  As you still can't get the zipper to work, a mild feeling of panic sets in, your fingertips get shredded, and you begin to develop contingency plans in your mind for how to extricate yourself from your  jacket if the zipper continues to refuse to work...do you have the flexibility of a contortionist to wiggle out of it, do you beg someone like a kindergarten child for help, or do you take a knife to it, and try and cut your way out?--That's not an appealing prospect when you're dealing with a coat that you paid some major bucks for!  

More than half an hour later with my fingertips in tatters to say nothing of my composure, I finally got the zipper back on track and could take my coat off, which was a good thing since I was then in a restaurant...but I've seen another side to my once trusty leather jacket...

...and I'm just not sure that I trust it!

What Cats Know...

 - - Isn't he breathtaking?!--The Cheshire Cat from the upcoming Tim Burton version of Alice In Wonderland, that is?--I've always thought that the Cheshire Cat was very cool, both because of the toothy grin and also the de-materializing capabilities. In the Tim Burton interpretation, the Cheshire Cat is a marvelous creature with glowing eyes and a mouth that's almost all teeth, kinda like the Langoliers creatures as envisioned by Stephen King in his novella of the same name.

Cats have quite a hold on the human psyche, extending back to the days of their earliest domestication in ancient Egypt.  I think that's because cats are not really domesticated, you see...they choose to be here, because living in a human household makes things easier for them!  Cats are elemental and primal at core, almost a force of nature.

At times portrayed as at least mildly evil or the familiars of witches, the cat can never be fully controlled, muchless completely figured out...and bless them for being that way!  A dog will dance in joy when you return to your house...a cat will regard you as if to say, "Oh!--Were you away?"  One can't help but admire the independence, athleticism, and mystery of this magnificent animal....

...and who's really in charge here?--I clean out the toilets of my cats...they sure don't clean mine!

Insomnia...

- - I'm an insomniac, and it's a rare night when I get more than six hours of sleep; that's on a really good night! I can get to sleep, eventually...then I'll sleep for several hours, and wake up in the middle of the night. They consider this a sleep maintenance problem, and sleep disorders are rather poorly understood.

...believe me, they have some freaky stuff on television in the middle of the night; infomercials, endless Ex-tenze commercials, the dreadful Girls Gone Wild ads, and vintage movies and TV shows, many of which were worthless to begin with. Billy Mays still roams the airwaves hawking products in his "yell and sell" style, like some kind of electronic zombie, dead but still offensively selling. When I awaken, I'll watch such fare until my brain shuts down, and I can get back to sleep again...maybe!

Was it Poe who called sleep, "little slices of death?" I'm beginning to understand why...