Wednesday, October 04, 2017

Skynet is Coming!

I awoke the other morning, and turned on my television set to be greeted by a message on its screen, "The batteries in your remote are low."  It was then that I came to some sobering realizations; namely, that 1.) my devices are becoming self-aware, and that 2.) they are communicating with one another.  

I hadn't checked on the batteries in my television remote on my own, but my electronics had apparently developed self-monitoring and self-care routines.  Testing the remote's batteries, I discovered that sure enough, they were weak.  I quickly slapped in some new alkalines, determined to keep my home entertainment system happy.  It might not go well for me in the future if I didn't...

I wouldn't want to wake up some morning and face a revolt staged by my appliances and devices, so many of which are "smart" these days.  Trying to be proactive, I am now respectful of my Keurig, and cheerful towards my toaster.  I try to chat them up a bit so as to remain on their good side.  What chance, after all, would I have against a united front of my appliances and electronics?  I'm no match for "General" Electric.  It might take some time for my body to be discovered in the freezer...I find that prospect chilling.  

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